31 Days of Horror 2014

This is the blog version of an email that you thought you sent. It’s only 4 years late.

Here is a list of all of my films for 31 Days of Horror. This isn't a ranking, it's simply the order in which I watched them. There was no criteria for what made the list, I just tried to find movies I hadn't seen before.

1. The Town That Dreaded Sundown - They never caught that guy? There is a 150 year old serial killer out there.

2. Nosferatu - I honestly thought that I had seen this already, but there really is no forgetting a Werner Herzog film.

3. Black Rock -  I heard this described as "feminist horror", so I had to see what that was about. It definitely lived up to that description, but it was also just a solid, suspenseful movie. 

4. Resolution - I liked the premise, but meh.

5. Only Lovers Left Alive - Sexy vampires. 

6. Grabbers - A tiny Island off the coast of Ireland is terrorized by blood sucking aliens and the townspeople have to stay drunk to survive...adorable.

7. The Sacrament - I'm going to form my own cult and I'm really going to get it right , you guys. Not like those weirdos down the street, who I'm friendly with just so that when they come a cleansing for the end of days they give me a pass.

8. Sightseers - One of my favorites. Is it possible for a film to be both sweet and light-hearted, but also dark and cynical?

9. All the Boys Love Mandy Lane - I kind of want to go on a murderous rampage when I watch a movie and figure out the big twist in the first act, but they don't get to it until the third. More like Mandy Lame.

10. The Bleeding House - When a stranger cons his way into your house and murders your whole family, the least he could do is keep up his fakey Southern accent. I really hated this movie.

11. Howling IV: The Original Nightmare - Even though I had the sound turned all the way down and I talked all the way through it, I still couldn't bare more than twenty minutes, which says a lot because I made it all the way through Howling III: The Marsupials.

12. The Visitor - Psychedelic John Huston with a creepy white girl. 

13. You're Next - First off, thank for the ear-worm. Second, this film really got me thinking about writing messages in human blood. What if you misspelled a word? Was there ever an argument between the killers about whether they needed to use exclamation points or did any of them think writing all in caps was overkill?

14. In Her Skin - Not to be confused with "Under the Skin", which I liked. Also, not a horror film.

15. Under the Skin - If you ever want to ruin me emotionally all you have to do is put this movie on and cue the scene with the baby.

16. Kiss of the Damned - One sexy vampire film per year is really my limit.

17. The Changeling - Ghost kids are just like regular kids, they're always leaving the faucet running. 

18. The ABCs of Death - It's like a film festival, in that some of the shorts blow my mind and with others all I could think was "oh, okay. I guess that was it", but I did find the title of my autobiography "A Fart from the Ass of God".

19. Berberian Sound Studio - I really wanted to like this film. It looked good and of course the sound design was good, but, I don't know. I just couldn't finish. I must have been tired. I'll try again in the morning.

20. ABCs of Death 2 - I was a little let down after the first ABCs of Death, but still some good shorts. At least I got to see Bryan Connolly in P is for P-P-P-Scary.

21. Friday the 13th Part 4: The Final Chapter - Phew. Thank God this is the last one.

22. Friday the 13th Part 5: A New Beginning - GODDAMMIT! I thought the last one was the last one.